Marilyn’s Q & A for Infants

By Marilyn Padget, Certified Parent Educator

Ask Marilyn: Answers to Your Most Common Infant Questions

KidsDirect’s Infant Questions and Answers is a free question and answer collection from Marilyn Padget, a Certified Parent Educator. The idea behind it is simple, give parents real answers to the questions that come up most with a new baby, drawn from years of parent education experience. common infant questions answered

Why is it unsafe to place my baby on his stomach to sleep?

Research has consistently shown a higher risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) when a baby sleeps on their stomach. What we know about SIDS is that babies can stop breathing unexpectedly, and a face down position makes that more dangerous, since young infants don’t yet have the muscle control to turn their head or clear their airway on their own if they need to. Always place your baby on their back to sleep, for every sleep, until their first birthday.

See KidsDirect’s SIDS Page


I’m nursing my baby. Is it okay to have my baby sleep in bed with me?

This is a question I get a lot, and I want to give you the most current, honest answer rather than the old advice some of us grew up hearing. The American Academy of Pediatrics does not recommend bed sharing under any circumstances, since it significantly raises the risk of SIDS and accidental suffocation, especially for babies under 4 months, babies born early or at a low birth weight, or any bed where an adult has had alcohol, medication, or anything else that affects how easily they’d wake up.

What the AAP does recommend instead is room sharing, keeping your baby’s crib or bassinet in your room, close to your bed but on its own separate, firm sleep surface, for at least the first 6 months. Room sharing this way is linked to as much as a 50 percent lower risk of SIDS, and you still get nearly all the practical benefits you’re probably after, easier nighttime nursing, faster comforting, and being right there to check on your baby, without the added risk that comes with sharing a bed.

See KidsDirect’s Safe Sleep and Room Sharing Page


What causes diaper rash?

Diaper rash usually develops when a baby’s skin stays in contact with a wet or soiled diaper for too long. Do everything you can to avoid it. Check your baby’s diaper often and change it as soon as it’s wet or dirty. Each time you change your baby, rinse the area gently with warm water, pat it dry rather than rubbing, and let it air out for a few minutes before the next diaper goes on. A barrier cream with zinc oxide or petroleum jelly works well to protect the skin from moisture. Talcum or baby powder is no longer recommended, since it can be inhaled and doesn’t actually treat the rash the way a barrier cream does. A clean, dry baby is a happy baby.

See KidsDirect’s Diaper Rash Decoder


Why do babies cry?

Crying is your baby’s way of communicating with you. Your job when they cry is to work out what message they’re trying to send. Use a process of elimination. Are they wet? Hungry? Too hot or too cold? Sick? Teething? One thing that helps almost every crying baby is hearing your voice, which soothes them unlike anything else. Talk to them, sing to them, make eye contact, and before long you’ll learn your baby’s cries the way you’d learn a second language. You’ll start to notice that the cry itself changes depending on what they need, which makes it easier over time to know what’s going on almost as soon as you hear it. If your baby cries endlessly and nothing seems to help, let your doctor know so you can rule out colic or anything else going on.

See KidsDirect’s Crying Page


How do I know if my baby is teething?

There are several physical signs to watch for. The first teeth to come in are usually the front lower ones. Check the gums, if your baby is teething they’ll often look swollen and feel warm to the touch. Drooling and a strong urge to bite or chew on everything are both classic signs. You might also notice crankiness, restlessness, trouble sleeping, or more crying than usual. Some babies run a mild fever or get a runny nose around the same time.

For relief, a chilled (not frozen) teething ring or a clean finger gently massaged over the gums both work well and are what the American Academy of Pediatrics currently recommends. Skip topical teething gels or liquids that contain benzocaine, including Orajel, since the FDA has specifically warned against using them in children under 2 due to a rare but serious risk to how the blood carries oxygen. If your baby seems genuinely uncomfortable, ask your pediatrician about an appropriate dose of infant acetaminophen rather than guessing at it yourself. Once the tooth breaks through, things usually settle down fast.


My four month old is starting to roll onto her side. I’m worried she might put her hand in a light socket. What can I do?

First and foremost, childproof the room she spends time in. Any hardware store sells outlet covers, pick some up for every electrical outlet within her reach. While you’re at it, look around for other hazards too, cords she could pull, sharp corners on furniture, small objects, anything within reach once she can roll or scoot. It’s also worth simply not laying her down near an outlet or anything else risky in the first place, since the safest hazard is the one she’s never near.


Is it better to use cloth or disposable diapers?

This really comes down to what fits your family’s life better. Disposable diapers are popular for the convenience, and today’s versions are genuinely well made and absorbent. Cloth diapers work just as well for a lot of families, cost less over time, and are easier on the environment, but they do involve more laundry and a bit more hands on effort. Neither choice is wrong. Pick whichever one you can actually keep up with.


What is colic?

Colic describes a pattern of excessive, hard to soothe crying in an otherwise healthy baby, and it’s fairly common, current estimates suggest it affects somewhere around 1 in 5 babies, though studies vary quite a bit on the exact number. There are several theories about what causes it, but no single confirmed answer. What we do know is that a baby with colic cries for long stretches, often at a similar time each day, even when they’re not wet or hungry. Keeping a rough log of when the crying happens can help you and your doctor spot the pattern. Check with your pediatrician, since there are strategies and in some cases treatments that can help.


I’m a new mother and worried I’m not holding my baby the right way. What’s the proper way to do it?

It’s completely normal to feel unsure as a new parent, and I’d guess you’re doing better than you think. The main things to keep in mind are holding your baby firmly but gently against you, and making sure their head and neck are supported at all times, since babies can’t hold their own head steady for the first few months. Once you do it a few times it becomes second nature. Relax, you’ve got this.


How important is it to burp my baby?

Very important. Burping helps release the air your baby swallows while feeding, which can otherwise turn into real stomach discomfort. Gently pat or rub their back, and if a burp doesn’t come right away, keep at it for a minute or two before trying again. One word of caution, keep a cloth handy, since plenty of babies bring up a little milk along with the burp.

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